This exercise helped me to remember that experience is doable and that categories are not. Categories are an abstraction and hard to define at that. Experience is presence and connection. The moment. People. If I want Louise in my life then I don’t need to define what she is to me, just enjoy her, explore and have fun together. Does she want me the most, crave my presence? What’s my consistent experience feel like? Excitement, discovery, achievement, hilarious mistakes? Intense connection and pleasure? Social play? Live fully and the rest will follow.