2025 Chapter Peoples Poetry Slam
Arborealists
01:42
trees getting rubbed out
elm and beech, hemlock
by bugs up from the south
supposed “foresters” couldn’t stop
••
they saw trees as lumber
just another resource to plunder
not our brothers and sisters in this world
until the coming of the daughter girl
••
they say she talked to the trees
in the still of the deep forests
and from the dirt freed
the true Arborealists
••
trees that could walk
and after a fashion talk
like Groot or Ents from the movies
Arborealists were pretty groovy
••
but the mobile trees were angry
axes and chainsaws remembered
they squashed ticky tacky houses
and so surburbia we surrendered
••
killing structures of concrete and steel
was more subtly contrived
probing roots could feel
buried pipes that kept buildings alive
••
data and electric still flowed
but flushed poop had nowhere to go
after modern dryads blocked the pipes
to slurp yummy soil of the night
••
apartment towers dropped population
tenants couldn’t stand the smell
then roots nudged gently at foundations
until the mighty buildings fell
••
funny how we thought
magic just myth and legend
then meet snarky trees
trashing a 7-Eleven
“Need Slurpee, kid?
Try our lemon-lime Triffed.”
Population
02:27
population dropped
obvious reasons
wars, plague, off-planet jobs
the unchanging seasons
kind of a bummer
this endless summer
••
we’ve managed with less bees
I don’t mind doing their work
helping plants to have sex
a registered flower pervert
••
there’s another reason why
Earth’s a de-peopled world
very rare to find a guy
who still liked girls
and most women, hello?
all about sappho
••
sex that makes babies
that’s so way back when
now ladies like ladies
and gentlemen, gentlemen
••
population reduction tip
same sex porning
and identical genital bliss
no new ones aborning
so long h. sapiens
c’mere lover, give us a kiss!
••
to make every boy on earth
lust after miley cyrus
your tax dollars at work
the gay therapy virus
••
holy book thumpers
wanted to cure all humans
pledge allegience to Trumpers
with god’s help, a new plan
••
conversion camps failed
need more science in the mix
what if we engineered
a GMO type fix?
••
gender flippy clownfish genes
leydig cells, testosterone machines
bake, splice, puree in a blender
new virus, so nice
clinical trial w/ mice
••
viola! success
queer boy rodents now happiest
with girl rodents in the nest
what’s next?
aerosol dispersion over America, top secret test
••
ha ha, you know the rest
global norm now gayness
backfired
national science advisor, retired
w/ a golden parachute
his silky high low? cute!
••
many attempts at breeding still
dutifully by science types
with expired viagra pills
and fluffers of the burly type
••
sexy style was beards and flannel
need wood? a lumberjack channel
cause everyone still loved babies
but getting preggers? definite maybe
••
straights like me
tiny minority
hardly any
reproduction so not trendy
••
Santa, help me find a sweet dish
sane, lusty, (and pretty please) straight-ish
to share my remote cave
before I’m wrinkled, old and gray
Fauna
1:05
wild bunnies prowling
in the old state park
they’ve got saber like teeth
that glow in the dark
if you see them haul ass
they’re not interested in grass
••
don’t hear any birds
not really sure why
nary a twitter or peep
a lot of them died
walk away if you find one
dead birds carry contagion
••
hear the uncanny yapping
of pomeranians gone wild
they’ve learned to make tools
and are discovering fire
••
as I mentioned before
the saurians are back
most colors are tame
except carbon fiber black
if you see one of those
expect swift attack!
••
once gentle deer, now cybernetic creatures
with titanium hooves, sharp as razors
and other sweet features
like ruby red eyes that shoot lasers!
••
new fauna made
in labs deep underground
'cause that's where the brave
scientists are found
Shangri latte
I hear rumors of shining cities
where the good life hasn’t changed
new clothes, grocery stores, yes even Netflix
and that old democracy game
improved! you get to vote for peeps
who don’t give you the creeps
••
Atop a big rock candy mountain
with fair trade latte and kambucha fountains
and everyone gets an electric Subaru
Forestor or Outback, you choose
••
there’s sandy beaches there as well
craft beer lakes fed with springs
like eden, no man ever fell
and everybody can sing
just have it YOUR way, have it your way
whether kite surfing or croche
••
screw that, I’m pretty glad
to squat these upper west side digs
the view is pretty rad
Central Park has wild pigs
••
got a lush kitchen garden
all the co2 makes veggies grow great
then there’s the cache of jars and cans
way beyond their expiration dates
••
not so good at hunting
tho others are, quite
and when we get all together
the potlucks are outta sight
Family First
1:00
what’s great about the changes
are the new ways we have of living
like the extended family arrangement
now every weekend is thanksgiving
••
hardly ever saw the cousins
they lived two states away
big sister was off at college
now they’ve all come home to stay
••
bring our scattered tribe together
and build a family clan
with the changes in the weather
everyone’s a weatherman
••
daily target practice
melee with staffs and swords
explosives improvisation
sun tzu, the art of war
••
alliances with the neighbors
to keep the fedgov out
trading goods and friendly favors
that’s what community is all about
••
used to be we’d bristle
when the smiths didn’t cut their lawn
silly gossip and facebook epistles
all that trivia is gone
••
the simple things in life
who can skin a deer
and get the tanning right
or brew a decent beer
Family First 2
00:54
the mom and her son
who make yarn out of plants
then dad weaves them into
sturdy shirts and tough pants
styled for sisters or brothers
and trades for bread and butter
••
we don’t have any schools
children aren’t fishes
we teach them to make tools
and fix fungus forage dishes
••
and to communicate with elan
though establishing rapport
unity among the clans
divide and conquer? nevermore
••
still see a lone helicopter
sortes in the faraway
their cache of gas and parts
will run out, eventually, one day
••
they fly a wary far off
from the clans’ hunting grounds
with catapulted bolas
we easily bring them down
if pilots and gunners survive
find them husbands or wives
More Undead
00:56
such a big fuss
what happens when you die
just ashes and dust
or groovy after life?
••
folks if buried
even pickled and boxed
might sprout up, sort of scary
graveyard crops
and they work real cheap
if you don’t mind the reek
••
even some folks
kept in ornate urns
if in water, soaked
could rehydrate and return
••
death, where is thy sting?
losing lovers is a harder thing
they are still on the planet
but never with you, dammit
••
maybe still say hello
and perhaps even talk
as long as your mellow
and don’t try to stalk
••
the dead, still here too
just broke up with conditions
easy to commune over tea
in the kitchen
when you learn to tune
and enhance intuition
••
we thought they were gone
no longer extant
we were totally wrong
not at all what death meant
Time
00:57
then there was snow
new glaciers came creeping
they slid down from the north
while all the factories were sleeping
••
scraping off cities
grinding them to sand
after oceans way south
had swamped the coast lands
••
the lesson we learned
from this geo-engineering
if we step gently on earth
then there’s no need for fearing
••
instead we all buckled on
our hobnailed boots
and ran amuck on the mother
squandering her loot
••
like all that carbon she sequestered
for a million million years
her bio-diversity blessing
and waters, pure and clear
••
so many sad choices
way out of touch
her whispered wild voices
never mattered very much
we had become too tame
from the civilization game
••
we learned the slow way
just start over again, fine
what’s 7 million days
in geologic time?
Works
01:45
grandma told about the cities
with the charcoal criss crossy streets
always flowing with new faces
way more than you could ever meet
••
couldn’t count them on your fingers
if you had a hundred hands
and the big lake’s vasty beaches
more than all those grains of sand
and if you could count the stars
more than all them even, by far
••
a hundred hundred grand clans
just passing each other by
you wonder why they went crazy?
that’s why
••
there were rivers of rushing metal
sometimes still, sometimes flowing
and colored blinky lights
told the metal when to stop or get going
••
here’s the craziest quirk
boggles the imagination
they were always doing works
so they could get a vacations
••
not sure what works were
she tried to explain
as if in your pants, a bur
that gives a scratchy pain
every step you take
a wincing face you make
••
I guess vacations were good
a week of doing nothing
except tipsing drinks, festivating foods
and for the grownups, sexy loving
••
they went to renty huts
that anyone could stay in
with renty vacation beds
that anyone could lay in
••
not like sleeping
w/ 100 unknown others
cause all vacations peeps
were spirit sisters and brothers
sharing magic style
frequent flyer miles
••
don’t get why vacations
were worth the works
i may not swoop the sky
but i like to watch birds
shaman’s caps drying
eat and let’s go flying
Relief Boxes
02:09
bulging air ships gently wafting
plump angels in the clouds dance
from their bellies falling softly
boxes! into our grateful hands
•
a billionaire prepared
a fleet of hydrogen truckers
relief from the air
for all us poor fuckers!
in SpaceX we trust
god bless you, Elon Musk
••
boxes of solar distillers
boxes of sprouting supplies
boxes of hygiene, poop composting even social games
with packs of cards and dice
••
boxes with practically everything
for civilization restart
and they glowed with mediatronics
so you could find them in the dark
••
we gathered and stashed those boxes
in every cranny and nook
we didn’t have to fight for them
they were everywhere we looked
••
besides being packed with goodies
to ease our deprivation
their mediatronic surface
was rich with computation
••
explaining this is tricky
if you never went to college
a savvy self organizing resin
to assist the sharing of knowledge
••
imagine a can of spray paint
that when you squirt it out
forms a digital media network
miraculous, no doubt
••
the paint is nano-riffic
with an affinity for connections
assembling tiny cameras, screens, and processors
to cause a zillion geek erections
boxes are coated with this goop
and once cured, it’s waterproof!
••
every side with info aglow
hemp cardboard shining bright
but like vintage Twilight Zone episodes
it’s all in black and white
that’s really not so bad, what sucks is
there’s a lot of ads
••
each box is wirelessly talking
to every box nearby
each a node in a vast new network
that’s nearly worldwide
what’s left of the world, that is
missed by the fan and the shiiit