Process Log 03-06-16

March 6

the reason D and D was a good game to pay in my youth is this. I wanted my characters to be the most wonderful ever and I did everything to develop them. I didn’t wonder whether it was ok to get stronger, wiser, more adept, all that mattered as I grew my character would have the most options and be able to experience more of the game. Have more adventures.

To see myself as a character, to play myself with all the resources available. I lay in bed this morning hanging my legs off the edge of the bed and looking at them. Fine legs, powerful legs. My body is pretty darn fine, great dice roll there. My intelligence is high, my attractiveness, my charisma, agility… I mean all the traits are significantly high rolls. All the fundamentals are there, high potential for success. So now, what does my character want and how does he go about getting? Well, my character wants most of all to feel good. Feel mighty and loved and hilarious and magical, delicious and so appreciated. To share appreciation. Also to stand alone and just know that he is powerful beyond all reckoning and measurement. That’s me playing the character, because outside the game there is the cosmos, where I stand.

There are games overlaid on games. One of the reasons we like games is that we have chosen to play one, every game is a reflection of life. The game of life is configured to seem deadly serious, the ending is death. When our character dies then we go get a snack. Or talk about how much fun the game was. Physicality shades into tendencies to be, which shades into what? pure vibration, pattern? emotions are a translation of the vibration, that’s built in. so we can assemble the physicality, groping perhaps to begin as we reactivate this fundamental perception but I am guessing this is a highly effective way to navigate, once developed. how do I feel right now? why this now? how can I feel a little better than I do now?